You've got homework. Again.

Big Brother Badger is four.  Okay, if you were to ask him, he would say four-and-a-half.  He attends a preschool program at his daycare.  Now, I reckon back in my day (shakes old lady fist), preschool was called nursery school and it mostly consisted of playing, eating a snack, taking a nap, and more playing.  We had a Christmas show, but we were the angels (cherubs?) and just had to kind of stand there.  Back in my day kids apparently were tremendous slackers.

Today, Big Brother Badger learns his numbers, his colors, his letters.  He learns to spell.  He learns math.  His Christmas show involves memorizing several songs, complete with dance moves.  He brings home elaborate art projects that involve glitter and glue and those plastic rolly eyes.  He also brings home work.  Now, I've taught college undergraduates.  If I were to assign the amount of work that BBB brings home, the kvetching would be endless.  Each day he brings home a worksheet where he practices his writing or math skills.  He has a spelling test each month and practice tests in between.

My response to this is two-fold.  First, because laziness runs strong in Bad Mommy, I get annoyed.  With three Little Badgers running around, it is difficult to make time to get the worksheets finished, plus BBB is usually not in the mood anyway after an already full day.  He gets tired and cranky and has trouble concentrating.  Yes, I do realize that this response is short-sighted and reflects badly on my parenting ability.  Secondly, I am proud.  I am proud of his teachers, for putting in the effort, and of him, for trying so hard.  I know that this response is more in-line with being a Good Mommy.

But, he is four!  What to expect when he is five and officially in kindergarten?  I imagine future worksheets detailing the periodic table and the electromagnetic spectrum.  Which is great (squeaks Good Mommy frantically)!  But, really (yawns Bad Mommy)?  I remember kindergarten being a little more stringent than nursery school.  We had our own little desks.  We had rulers and pencils and a very structured day.  But I don't remember this much homework.  I can see that with our hyper-competitive society, any advantage might be desirable.  An extra hour every day, from preschool, might mean the difference for getting into Harvard.  Or, that extra hour spent after preschool could be utilized engaging with family and imaginative play.  In my humble experience, academic achievement is linked to desire, and enjoyment.  If you really enjoy your subject, or you really desire that degree, you will do better than if not.  Burning out your preschooler is probably not a good idea in the long-term.  And I do worry about burnout in him.  I see a slight fear of going to school, a casual mention of worrying about all the rules, an intense focus on an activity that will devolve into tears of frustration if he doesn't succeed.

So, I am left to be confused.  Confused between my childhood experience, viewed through the foggy rose-colored lens of time, and the present experience of my oldest child, viewed through the sharper, but subjective lens of Mommy.  Confused between my initial response (Bad Mommy) and the "correct" response (Good Mommy).  I have a kid who is bright, curious, and enjoys his imagination.  I don't want to screw that up.  So, I compromise.  Good Mommy tries really hard to motivate her son, coaching him when he's confused, and praising him when he does his best.  But, if he's simply had enough, and he would rather chase a butterfly or play with an ankylosaurus, Bad Mommy steps in surely and swiftly, and makes sure that old-school learning is still not out of style.